The other day I read an article about times when it's okay to have a "Mommy Meltdown." I almost laughed because they were so mild! I mean really, who has mommy meltdowns over those things?...but I digress. I thought I would give real life illustrations of the times that I have almost had a mommy meltdown. All of these are about Bo, because Blade would never dare!
1. That one year he ate sand, or dirt of some kind pretty much every day. I had to have him tested for PICA. His Dr. said, "I think he's just an ornery little boy." He was so right.
2. That time he finger painted our rental house with peanut butter. He even painted the carpet.
3. The time he showed up wet after apparently going swimming by himself.
4. The time he trapped Blade under a storage bin, in the wading pool, and was sitting on top of it.
5. That time he knocked out two of his teeth from superman diving into the tub.
6. The time he celebrated an early Ash Wednesday with soot out of the fireplace. I cleaned on that for days.
7. The oil paint incident. I'll leave that one up to your imagination. Yes, it was that bad.
8. The time he tried to jump in the pond. He was one.
9. The time he rode his little 4-wheeler on the main road. In my defense, I wasn't there for that one.
10. The time he drew monsters all over my new house with a permanent marker.
11. The time he played tattoo artist with a permanent marker, on his face.
12. The time he went and stood in a fire ant pile on purpose.
13. The time he dumped a whole big bag of rice.
14. The self rising flour incident.
15. The time he pulled every single thing down in my closet. I had it all color coordinated too.
16. The many loads of laundry that I folded, that were suddenly unfolded.
17. The times he threw eggs on my freshly mopped floor.
18. The time he put quarters in my sister's air-conditioning unit, and it stopped working.
19. The many times he has streaked in public.
20. The time he overturned a cart with Blade in it, at the supermarket. They called the manager.
21. The many times he threw my IPhone in the bathtub.
22. The time he jumped on my new ukulele.
23. The times he emptied all the shampoo bottles, on the floor of the bathroom.
24. The time he was floating out to sea at the beach, and my sister's brother in law had to run out and get him.
25. The multiple times he would tackle anyone who had a boiling cup of coffee in their hands.
26. The time he poured hot coffee through the vent in my sister's loft. It rained coffee in the living room.
27. The many times he's pooped in a public pool.
28. The time he had Blade in a headlock, under the water, in the bathtub.
There have been many, many other incidents, but they were mostly minor stuff like:
riding his bike off the trampoline, hijacking Blade on the little 4-wheeler and running into a tree, and emptying out everything under the sink.
Maybe these things aren't that major, but after remembering all this, I feel tired. What causes you to have a Mommy Meltdown?
